Top 10 things I will NOT miss about the UK

Again, not in any particular order:

1. The tube - better than Melbourne, but it's still crap. Line closure every weekend, strikes, random failures, delays... 
2. Fat people on the tube - the score shall remain at 2-0
3. Getting to the Emirates and then back home - there has to be a better system... took me 2 hours to get to the game once and over an hour to get home. When I went to Camp Nou, a much bigger stadium (thus more people) and taking the metro took me 20 minutes door to door covering similar distances
4. British people and Europeans, seriously you are not as good as you think you are, get over it!
5. American tourists - rude and stupid, there are nice people and smart people but a lot of them are not. I still can't get over the white sauce bolognese questions in Italy 
6. Chinese groceries - the fact that I can't get everything I need at the same place
7. The weather - dark and cold in the winter months. The fact that when it snows, sure it looks pretty but nothing works when it snows
8. Black nose coming home everyday
9. Crap food - apart from Dinings of course
10. British TV - lots of channels but also a lot of crap

Fatman 2 KH 0

Not sure whether this was the same fat man but I think it could be. I offered my seat to a woman 2 stops before but was declined because she was only on for 1 stop. At Earl's Court, the guy next to me suddenly ran off and that was the beginning... the seat next to me became free and at that moment the fat man pounced. His eye must have lit up and everyone else backed off. He got closer and when he was 1 metre away he pulled off a 180 and that was when I first noticed him. His butt crack was clearly visible by then and it was too late for me to escape. When he got to the seat he let gravity do the trick. I felt like I was in a jumping castle and someone landed next to me. I was pushed against the glass panel and was trapped there for the next 3 stops. Fat man 2, KH 0.

Top 10 things I hate about London buses

10. Bus drivers drive too fast and you end up falling if you don't hang on to anything.


9. People who get on for 1 fricken stop, it's not that far, in fact you can sometimes see the next stop. Just walk dammit!


8. Fat people, please see 9, it may help. Should they pay double or is it discrimination?


7. Buses that don't stop even when there are heaps of space.


6. Possibly due to the fact that some people don't move into the middle of the bus.


5. People who insist on sitting next to you on the inside when there are heaps of other seats on the bus.


4. Fat people who may crush you when the bus suddenly breaks and they could potentially fall on you.


3. Buses that don't stop even when you press the stop button and you end up having to walk back from the next stop.


2. Buses that don't come and when it does, 2-3 of them come at the same time. Thanks guys, stick to the timetable next time.


1. Bus drivers changing shift mid way through the route, wtf is with that? They stop on the side of the road for 10min cos the new driver has to get ready. Can't you do that at the end stop?

Feel free to suggest more!